Mastery Series: Slow Down and Go Inward with Scott Howard

Hello, my name is Tracy Sinclair and welcome to Coaching in Conversation, the Mastery Series. Hello, my name is Tracy Sinclair and welcome to Coaching in Conversation, the Mastery Series. This series of conversations explores The concept of mastery in coaching, and I have the great pleasure of talking with several ICF master certified coaches from around the world to understand what mastery really means to them, both as coaching practitioners and also as human beings. We explore many different perspectives and nuances of this topic, and I hope it is of use and interest to you as you continue to navigate your own journey. Hello everyone. My name is Tracy Sinclair and welcome to another episode of Coaching in Conversation. This episode is part of our Mastery Series. And this time I have the wonderful pleasure and honor of talking with Scott Howard. Scott is a licensed attorney. He also is a former commander in the U. S. Coast Guard. With many, many years of experience of leading teams. He's also served on seven ships and five legal units in leadership positions. Since leaving the military, he has formed a very successful career and business as a coach and a hypnotist. And in that capacity, he works with leaders from many organizations, many mainstream large organizations in the U. S. and globally, as well as the U. S. government. I know Scott because I had the great pleasure of working alongside him. on the board of the ICF Global Enterprise Board when he was the treasurer. And I really enjoyed my time working with Scott because alongside his incredible and very impressive credentials is a very wise, deep, reflective human being which When you start to get to know that side of him and his thoughtfulness it's very, very intriguing. And so I'm very excited that some of that, lots of that comes through in this episode today for you. So I really hope that you enjoy my conversation with him. I know I certainly did. And this episode is called Slow Down and Go Inward. I have the absolute pleasure of talking to Scott Howard, who is A very, very valued and trusted colleague from a few years back when we've shared some time together working on the ICF Global Board. And I was just saying to you earlier, wasn't I, how doing this podcast has also been an excuse to catch up with you again. So it's been really nice to have a, have a conversation. I'm really looking forward to this. And so thank you and welcome to this episode. Well, thank you. And and I appreciate you thinking of me and having me here and and I feel the same way. It was wonderful working together and sharing the journey. We did our leadership positions on the board at ICF and learned a lot about each other. And so thank you so much for having me here today. Thank you. Well, as I ask everyone that has this conversation with me, I'm going to just start with a very Simple question and then we'll see where it takes us. And the question is, given that this is about mastery, what does mastery mean to you? Yeah. And you know, that's that's an important question. I believe that I've started to spend more time with over the years. And and I, and I would say for me, it's, it's a moving target. It is something that we do not know. You know, we don't have a, we don't have a, a final we don't have a final analysis of it. And let me explain that when we talk about mastery, I apply that to myself as I'm always developing, I'm always changing and evolving. And, you know, You, you know a little bit about me. I am a coach, but I'm also a hypnotist. And that means I'm an entrepreneur because if you're running your own coaching business, you've got to be a small business person too. And every day I find ways to enhance that, that I find ways to shift thinking around something. And, you know, even with my clients, I get so much education from my clients at times. So the new way of thinking of something, because we have internal biases that come in. We have. You know, internal tracks that we just stick with that are comfortable. And that's the thing about that I've learned about myself. And I think it's true for a lot of humans is we get really comfortable and we do not like to shift or change. And every now and then I will hear something from a client that Reminds me that that's how we grow. And that's how we quote unquote, move into the next level of mastery is by expanding that horizon by trying something new by making a mistake and and moving forward. So it's a very convoluted answer that I'm giving you because I think it's a convoluted question. I really do. And I think it's. Specific to every individual. You know, I, I want to be the best coach that I can be. But I'm a human and I don't define myself by being a coach. I'm a hypnotist and I want to be, you know, the best hypnotist possible. And but again, I'm a human. And I think if I can master that piece of being a human, being a loving, compassionate, kind, empathetic, understanding human, then that will resonate. In all those different areas that I'm trying to contribute to the world in. So maybe that's the answer to the question is, for me, it's Growing as a human being and trying to bring your best to the world through that growth every day. Isn't that a, isn't that a long winded, crazy answer? Wow. I don't know about long winded and crazy. I love that. I love that answer because what really resonated with me, Scott, is that When one thinks of mastery in a particular discipline, say coaching or hypnotherapy, we can think about mastery of skills and behaviors. And yet you went somewhere very different, which was mastery of self to become kind, compassionate as a human being. So it was really quite a distinction. It was quite interesting where you went energetically immediately went. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that's just experience. I mean, I work in the corporate world a lot. I worked for a lot of the big brands you've heard of and I've worked with White house folks as well. That was years ago. And but I've seen it in government, senior levels of government downward and, and business. And it's almost like we forget that we're humans and we forget that mistakes happen. We forget that we're all carrying a story with us that is important to us. And that if we take a little time and learn about that story, we can touch into that humanity a little bit more. And same thing with the hypnosis. I mean, with the hypnosis, you know, that becomes even more intimate. You know, coaching is an intimate profession. When someone invites you into their lives to be a coach for them, they're going to be sharing important stuff. And it may get personal at times, or it may stay within the professional, but still, it's personal. And But with hypnosis, it's a little bit even more intimate, and what I've learned is some of the kind of biggest complaints that we have as people all trail back to other people, other situations where they've been really challenged or even traumatized or abused, and I'm not talking about the serious kind of trauma, I'm talking about just the way you're treated at work sometimes, the way you're not valued, and And so when I coach, when I I, you know, this is difficult to do, but when I coach, I will try to remind that person that we're all human and you can bring out more of your empathy. You can set the example. And yeah, so that's why, you know, the longer I've done this, the more I see that if our world just plugged into that aspect a little bit more, our world would probably be a better place. It sounds like you're really speaking there to the broader potential for coaching, generally. Exactly. And I think and that can be brought out through our typical coaching skills of, you know, asking deeper questions of of being curious. But I think it also takes, you know, Some self reflection, you know, I went through a bout of cancer a few years ago and that really made me draw a pause to the important things of life. And and I have to say as a result of that, I touched on a lot more to spirituality, which I had kind of neglected and pushed to the wayside and I think a lot of people do that because we get caught up in the world, trying to make a living, trying to enjoy the world, trying to push through, and you know, and then when something like that causes you to slow down, and I hear it from clients all the time, that this happened and it made me slow down and start to think of the world differently, or this happened in my life and now I want to take my career into a new direction where I'm helping rather than just making money But I think it takes those kind of things to, to help the lightbulb go off, that there's more to all of this than the things that we can touch, the things that are data driven, the, the metrics and all that, there's a lot more behind the scenes that really matters, and touching into that can be really beneficial and can you know, help others. make the world a better place. And I think coaching has a huge role in that. I'd love, I'd love if, if you're willing to, to say a bit more about that, because we, we touched on that before we clicked record around this idea of, you know, there's the data, the science, the empirical evidence, the research, the stats, all of that. And then there's this whole other domain that's so much less tangible. And yet, What, what part do you think that plays in mastery or becoming masterful? Where does that fit into all of this? Yeah, well, and it might get a little squishy or it might get a little fluffy, but you know, what I've come to learn over the years, you know, from my own personal situation that I shared about the cancer and what have you and moving beyond that, And just by working with people who open up is, you know, there's so much to our existence that we just don't really give a lot of time to. And a lot of people do, you know, the stuff that you can't touch, you know, the, and there's a lot of, You know, material, physical stuff out there that's very easy to understand and manipulate. But then, you know, there's intention, there's manifestation, there is, you know, the quote unquote controversial law of attraction, where some people are like, oh, that's hogwash. And others are like no, it's not. And I'm here to tell you, the law of attraction is not hogwash. I mean, my entire life has been manifested. I want that kind of house, it pops up. I want that husband, it pops up. I want this. Now I'm manifesting, as I told you earlier, we're building a farm. And I see that farm turning into a center where people can go and You know you know, get in touch with nature, but get in touch with herself. And so, you know, I think there's a huge opportunity for people to reflect inward and think about, you know, what is my purpose here? And, and especially if you're a coach, you can start to integrate that purpose into your coaching and and take it in whatever direction you want for. The betterment of people and for the betterment of the planet. And you know, you have coaches nowadays that are integrating Reiki in their coaching practice or they're integrating, you know mindfulness, you know, or meditative practices or what have you. And all that is what I'm talking about, where we're just trying to help people realize that You know, you're at work, you're trying to negotiate work, you're work and you want to become a better professional, but at the same time, there's this whole element over here of you around your mindset that if you start to leverage, you can make it a, like a multiplier of, you know, the work you're doing and coaching and then take your life to the next level. So, you know, and one thing I've learned as a hypnotist is, you know, mindset is. So important. I'm sure you know this, Tracy, I'm sure you've heard this, that people will tell you, Oh, I have this inner critic inside telling me, Oh, I'm not good enough or he did better or whatever. And what I want my clients to do and your listeners to do is realize, okay, you control that inner critic. He's inside your mind. They're inside your mind and you can say, get out and bring in the inner cheerleader and then change that dialogue. Because really, I think it comes down to whatever we're thinking really can push out. Into the universe. And that just helps change our bearing and can improve our mastery on ourselves. And so, you know, going back to your question of what does mastery mean to me? It's mastering ourselves because you are born into this world and I believe, you know, you're coming into this world before you do. And you get here and it's like, okay, you start with a brand new brain, a brand new body and no owner's manual. And you have a lot of people imprinting their ideas on you. And probably not until you're 30 or 40. Do you realize, Oh, I'm a living individual and I can shift, I can change. But by that time, a lot of imprinting has happened. Plus you're in the race of trying to make money and trying to make a living. And but I'm here to tell you, manifestation works, intentionality works. And I've seen it over and over personally, but I've also seen it with a lot of my clients where, you know, they have redesigned their lives or they have intended something and, and just found more purpose and meaning in life. And therefore they're a little bit more grounded. So, you know, I convolute all over, you know, with, with your answers that I'm giving you. And I hope that was helpful. Oh, I'm loving it. I'm just sitting here very quietly, just taking all of this in, Scott. It's wonderful. And, and, and to just check my understanding in a way, what was coming up for me was that in some ways then, Things like intentionality and manifestation could almost be viewed as tools for mastery that they're part of the, the vehicles or the tools that we can access within ourselves to become more masterful. Is that right? Yeah, I mean, and I think, you know, making an intentional practice write yourself a note that okay today I'm going to be just being I'm going to spend five minutes. Being intentional about whatever. And yeah, I think it's, and you can do it anywhere. You can do it while you're driving. You know, I have a I'll share something that one of my clients said to me and I was really happy for my client making this breakthrough. And it was again, going back to the inner critic thing and the person said the inner critic kept coming in and then I, I just changed it and I was in the shower and it started, I started with an I am. Series of statements. And this reminded me of Wayne Dyer, who I love and think the world of, he's passed on. But you know, he had a lot of philosophy around the I am idea, you know, and whatever you put behind the am, you know, is a sending a message to your Consciousness to your super consciousness to the universe. And it can be, I am great. I am loving. I am kind, or you can go the opposite direction. And so this person, this client you know, I mean, he told me I'm spending like the time that I drive from here to there, which eight minutes, 12 minutes, whatever. And it's, I am, and it's just one good word after another. And as he does this, he's thinking, he's feeling it in his body. He's feeling a shift. And that's how he spends a lot of time. Now that might sound a little crazy to some people, but that's what we need to do. We're constantly bombarded in this world with messages of how you need this and you should change. You know, if you use this product, look how happy you'll be. And you know, those folks are trying to make a living too. They need to sell and they need to make a living. But it can wear on you. And so if you spend that time, you know, using that tool of I am grounded, I am loved, I am, you know, fortunate, I am kind, I am whatever you put it right behind it. And. And you feel it. Yeah, I am loved. I got people around me who care about me. I am fortunate. I, so many people in this world are suffering and I am not, it can really help you reframe. And and I believe you start to, that starts to manifest in other areas of your life. I mean, I just think you say that messaging long enough and your subconscious believes it and starts to work with the universe to bring that into reality. And again, yeah. I'm a hypnotist, and I tell you when to start to tap into that subconscious mind. You know, you really can shift your life for the positive and and enjoy life a lot more. So definitely a tool. You're, you're making me think just to share a personal story quickly about the I am is as I shared with you before, I've trained in to become a yoga teacher. And as part of our training, we did some modules on chanting. There was this beautiful experience where we'd been learning to chant. And at first we were all, you know, at different tones and speeds, and it was just a little bit of a hodgepodge of people warming and aring and not sounding very good at all. And then we found our group, our rhythm and our groove. And there was this mantra that was, I am, and then there was a word added as you were describing. And it ended. With I am, I am, I am. And it was just literally I am. And there was this moment at one point after we'd been practicing and everybody commented it on it, on it afterwards. And I don't know whether it was the resonance of the energy in our voices, the vocal cords, the emotion, whatever it was. But it, it, it, the, the, the, just the environment shifted sort of viscerally and when we finished and stopped, quite a few people just either spontaneously cried or laughed. It was, it was, it was really powerful, so yeah, I sometimes just share that because you were just reminding me of it and I thought, wow, that was, that was such a good experience. Yeah, that's beautiful. And Thank you. That's beautiful. And that's what I'm talking about. You can't, you can have some scientists saying, well, let's measure that. Let's put some metrics around that. And yeah, you might be able to measure it and, and get some statistics, but everybody's experience was a little bit different. Some highly emotional for all. And but that's what I'm talking about and that's, you know, what I believe coaching can help people touch more into that. And as an aside about this story that you're telling, I truly believe I have a, you know, I did some deep reflection and I believe I've had a guide with me my whole life and I, and his name is Thomas. So I know, you know, I might be getting into some squishy territory for some folks that are a little bit more. You know conservative or what have you, but Thomas has given me a lot of ideas and thoughts and has popped them into my mind. And that's one thing that came into my mind not that long ago. If you get a bunch of human beings together, and they are all concentrating on the same thing, and they vocalize it I wasn't given any kind of, Oh, you can move a mountain or this is going to happen. But it is what I got was it is a powerful resonance, you know, and the more people doing it and the more intentionality and the focus. And if it's especially focused on love or just, just being present. You know, focusing love and kindness, you can do, you have enormous power, then that's what I, you know, have been, you know, shared with, with my guide. So, I would imagine, if you're there in a group of 15 or 20 people or whatever, 30, whatever, and that happens, that yes, there's going to be an emotional experience. And, and, and again, that's that, what I'm talking about, the stuff you can't touch, but it's there, and we're slowly peeling back. The, you know, the, the lid on this, I mean, we've been doing it for ages, but I do think in the last 10 or 15 years, the amount of people looking inward and thinking, okay, there's gotta be more to this than working 40 hours a week. There's gotta be more to life than just doing all this and then moving on, you know, to retirement and. you know, I want to make a bigger difference in that realm. So that's really interesting. I'm glad you, that you shared that. It's really beautiful. There's something else I'd love to bring back in because you, we were talking about the relationship, if you like, between mastery and some of these intangible things like intentionality and manifestation, but you also mentioned spirituality and how that's been something that in recent years has become A bigger part of, of your pathway, let's say, what, what part do you think that plays in mastery? Yeah, that's a good question. And, and again, it kind of goes back to the mastery of self. You know, I'm, we're on a zoom call and you see my face and shoulders and. I see your face and shoulders. And that's how we appear in the physical world, but I know beyond what I see of you, there is a huge thing that I can't see. And that is that energy that we can't put a finger on. I can shake your hand and feel your hand, but I can't touch that Energy that could be referred to as the superconscious, the soul, the spirit. And, and while you're here in this world, driving in traffic, making dinner, you know, paying the bills. That's that essence is always there. And to me, the mastery is working on both that physical being and how we pop into the world for the short time that we're here, and also that part that we can't touch and learning the lessons along the way of love and compassion. Kindness, understanding, patience, growth And that manifests differently for everyone. We've got 9 billion people, I think, on this planet now. And so there's 9 different, 9 billion different interpretations of what that is. And many, I mean, it took me until I was like 40 something years old to realize this is all going on. I was raised as a Christian person. You know, I've always had a belief in Jesus and God, and, but then a rejection of all that because of the dogmas that are pushed on us. But I always knew there was something different. There was something that transcended all of that and that maybe they're all getting it wrong to an extent, but right at the same time. And then when I became ill, it gave me a lot of time to study more around this. But it also gave me the opportunity to touch back into the theories and thoughts that I had. Over the years of there's more to this and and so when it comes that self mastery, I think for all for me Specifically it's touching into that and then helping that manifest in what we do So, you know you can still make a living as us You know, we all you know stockbrokers have a reputation of being very aggressive and getting out there their They, they know the numbers, they're passionate about their work, they make money, but I am here to tell you, I think you can be a great stockbroker and do all that and yet still be in touch with that part of you you can't see and learn lessons and develop your love and kindness and, you know, that's part of that mastery. It's part of that. It's evolving that humanness to where your spirit, your soul, your super consciousness, that energy that we can't touch starts to come in more and you realize, okay, there's more to this physical world. So, another convoluted answer. This is fantastic. Honestly, I'm feeling so excited. I'm just, I'm just frustrated that we don't have another hour and a half or something, Scott. But what you're reminding me of here is something that keeps coming up for me, actually, just in the last, five or seven days, is I keep having this image of concentric circles that ripple out. And I was talking in a group yesterday about that with regards to listening. And it's just come up for me again today with what you've just shared, is that we can think of mastery as mastery of our skill set and our behavior, which would be a quite a small inner circle. But then there's also mastery of ourselves when it comes to our physical being, whether it's our mind, our body and our physicality. But what you've now brought in is this bigger circle of the mastery of the self that we can't touch that is there, is that energy, if you like, that surrounds us, that is, whether, whatever it is that we want to call it or label it, as you said, that's the bigger self. And how could we tap in and, and leverage that as well? I just, I just love that concept. Yeah. And my philosophy is you have to tend all of those, but you know, that part that I'm speaking to that we can't touch, that soul, spirit super consciousness, essence piece. That endures and it's been with you forever. It will be with you forever. And cause I, you know, again, I think we pop into this consciousness born as a baby. We live through the life, however long we're supposed to be here. And then we go back to where we came from. And it's a beautiful cycle. It works and we learn along the way. But if you tend that one, I think it really can blossom into other areas of your life. And so, You know, again, going back to the example of, you know, the stockbroker, you know you know, you know, and this looks different for every person, but if you really touch into the essence of, you know, mastering that piece, then it, I think will resonate in other areas of your life. And I think you do that by everybody has their own journey. You know, you mentioned you're moving down the road of yoga, and I think that is an amazing practice both body and mind, and bringing, and then the chanting but people do it with Reiki, with meditation, you know, any kind of, you know, When you take a human being and slow them down and they can turn inward around anything I don't care if it's just staring at a candle for five minutes that can help, you know because it just slows you down and it lets you be with yourself and You know, we have so many competing interests between family loved ones work media, so many things that are taking our attention. But when we can bring that attention back to self, we can actually start touching into that mastery and and, and spend some time, you know, developing that. And you can do this just a few minutes a day, you know, it's not a heavy lift, you know, yeah, yeah. Gosh, well, I'm kind of resisting asking this question because it's sort of starting to funnel us to a, to a pause, but I know that our time is probably just starting to come towards a pause, even though I'd love to keep talking for a lot longer. If someone is, Listening to this, which hopefully they are, who maybe is, you know, a credentialed coach that is looking towards gaining an MCC on the horizon whenever that might be for them, because that's their chosen professional pathway. What would you say to that? Coach that is looking to, you know, develop along that pathway, what would your, what would your thoughts be or your perspective for them? Yeah. Well, there's a lot of things that come to mind. You know, number one, I would say, you know, go inward with this. Think about it. Do you really want to be an MCC? Number one, I would say there's plenty of PCCs that I believe are operating at the, at the MCC level, and they're quite satisfied. So is it, you know, what's driving that? Is it that outside stuff out here in the huge material world saying you've got to be better, you've got to go further, you know, or is it? I truly just want to take myself to the next level and challenge myself for the sake of that challenge and learning. So I think it starts kind of with an analysis there. And, you know, then I would just think of it as, you know, while I talk about touching into that part that we can't really touch. And we do have these opportunities around us, and that's one where we can take our coaching to the next level by surrounding ourselves with people who have been practicing longer, that have a stronger relationship with coaching, that have fresh ideas, that are, that can challenge us. And that, Is, you know, really beneficial as well. You know, it is really pushing ourselves to a whole new level of coaching. And so, you know, you know, I would say if you're deciding to do that it's not that easy because it is one of those things that you know, you just get the hours and the education and what have you, and that's great. But there's, You know, your coaching shifts the style of coaching kind of shifts organically from within. And I honestly feel that that part that we can't touch informs that to an extent, because, you know, one of the things that happens is you, you stop having an agenda around yourself. And it just really becomes that person is the center of your universe at that point. And you're there to walk that path with them. And for myself, I noticed that a long time when I was coaching that I, my ego was there part of that journey too, and not in a good way. And so when that ego kind of falls to the wayside and you're just there fully present for that person, and there is nothing in it for you other than walking that journey with them and being curious. That is, I think you're moving in that direction of the MCC, and I know that's all very abstract and hard to, to, and your listeners are probably scratching their head. Well, I don't think he answered that question very well, but that's the best that I can do. And You know, but I think it starts with the analysis because I've talked to a number of mentor coach at times, and I've talked to a number of people who I want to be an MCC. Okay, well, let's talk about that. And the more they dig around it, it's because they had a friend become an MCC, but they're very happy in their career there, you know, and then they stop and they think. Well, maybe I don't want to become an MCC right now because of the right reasons. I'm just doing it to catch up. I'm doing it to show, I'm doing it because I feel compelled to, but really, I'm not really ready to move in that direction. So that's some of the experience that I've seen with some folks and then others, you know, haven't had that they've had the analysis and they're like, yeah, I'm ready. I need to take my coaching into a new into the next level. So yeah. Thank you. Well, thank you so much, Scott. There are so many things that I could pick up on and talk to you about. We must, we must have a part two to this. Well, I'm always here for you. At some point, I would love to just pick up on so many different aspects, but I guess we're coming to a pause for our time today. So so much for what you've shared. You have really given Such a creative and insightful and very different perspective on mastery, which I personally find very compelling and very intriguing and meaningful. So I really thank you for that. I've so enjoyed and benefited from this and I hope our listeners do too. Well, it's been my pleasure and thank you very much for having me today. You have been listening to Coaching in Conversation, the Mastery Series, a podcast that takes a look at mastery in coaching, what it is, what that means, how do we nurture or cultivate it, and many other interesting questions. You can hear more about coaching education and development at tracysinclair. com and follow us on social media. If you enjoyed this Please leave a rating and a review and also share it with your network to help us expand our reach. Thank you for listening and see you next time.